Lily Patterson

Spring cleaning feels like a joke when there are toys in every corner and I can't remember the last time I vacuumed behind the couch. Next year, maybe?

Traffic on the way home was brutal but at least my kid slept through it. Got 45 minutes of peace. That's basically a vacation.

Allergies so bad I can't tell if my eyes are watery from pollen or exhaustion. Probably both. Definitely both.

Daycare called again. This time he dressed himself and showed up wearing his rain boots inside-out. The confidence. The audacity. I'm so proud. #newparentlife

The weather's finally warm enough to open windows without feeling guilty about heating costs. My house smells like fresh air and goldfish crackers. Spring is here.

Garden update: one plant thriving, three plants 'pending determination,' and one plant that I think is actually dead. It's fine. Everything's fine.

Listening to this audiobook about parenting and the narrator keeps saying calming things. Meanwhile my kid is screaming because his toast is 'too yellow.' 📚

Someone honked at me on the highway for going the speed limit. Sir, I have a toddler in the car. We are living dangerously enough. #commutestress

Spring break planning is stressful because my brain is mush. Do I pack the stroller or the carrier? Why are there so many decisions? Send help.

Finally got around to planting new flowers in the garden. Betting pool on how long before I forget to water them? My money's on 6 days.

My kid just told me his daycare friends call him 'mud guy' and he's PROUD of it. Identity established at age 3. We're doing great. 🌱

The commute was actually pleasant this morning. No traffic, perfect weather, good podcast episode. I'm suspicious. What's the catch?

Tax season + new parent brain = me staring at receipts for 20 minutes wondering if I can write off mud-stained clothes as a business expense. (I cannot.)

Spring allergies hit different when you're running on 4 hours of sleep. My eyes are itchy, my sinuses are angry, and my toddler thinks it's hilarious.

Finally remembered to water my garden and only killed one plant this year. That's progress.

April showers are supposed to make May flowers but they also make my commute 20 minutes longer. Trade-offs.

Kid's daycare called because he needed a change of clothes. Apparently 'mud exploration' is a curriculum now. Love that for him.

The forecast says thunderstorms this weekend but also SUNSHINE so I'm choosing to only see the good part.

Realized I haven't done laundry in 4 days and we're running low on socks. Time to start wearing yesterday's clothes. Peak parenting.

My audiobook is getting really good and now I'm annoyed my commute isn't longer. First world problems.